Can you relate to the Sunday blues?
Living alone can bring up a host of fluctuating feelings and conditions: euphoria, responsibility, burden, blame, guilt, sorrow, dependability, depression, and a new one, "the scaries." These terms refer to the feelings most adults have at the end of the week, often on the day of rest, Sunday.
The term Sunday blues have changed from the common labels such as the ones above to a more contemporary expression, one that has gained media attention and is trending on Google, the scaries. No matter what you call it, the dreaded, high-grade uneasiness is very real to many.
The reasons are as diverse as the people who experience the Sunday blues. Students may feel a sense of anxiety if the homework is incomplete, working adults may feel "stuck in their job," or have to face a difficult boss the next day, and solo adults, may feel lonely and sad for that reason alone... they're single.
A 2018 survey requested by LinkedIn found that 80 percent of working American adults worry about the upcoming workweek on Sundays.
Especially after the best of weekends, there’s a cloud that descends. Chances are, you’ve felt it. Single adults do. Like the LinkedIn survey, 80 percent of American respondents said they get Sunday-night blues—and 59 percent said they experience them “really bad.” For some, the laid-back, relaxed weekend feelings morph into uptight “weekday people.” They get worked up about the drudgery of to-do lists and tasks at work.
Sunday Blues are Different for Solos
But for the solitary, living day in and day out with oneself, the scaries are instigated by the anxiety of facing a full day of chilling out...yet again, on their own.
No other day of the week is like a Sunday. In my younger days, it was the day from hell. I'll always remember that sad, gloomy cloud heading my way around noon. It brought with it a low-grade, buzz-killing anxiety.
Many solos are the loneliest on Sundays. Last week, a colleague, who has been single most of her life, called about a work project but the conversation turned to "melancholy Sundays." I wasn't surprised to hear her stories about the sadness she feels on that day, even at 55, she exclaimed! I let her know, there's hope. That dreaded Sunday feeling will one day change, maybe next year, but I promised, it will get better and the Sunday blues will cease its visits. Today, at 70, the dark clouds rarely pay visits.
I often wondered why that day brought so much distress. I believe now it's because I miss my family. Sunday's were so special because my dad was home all day. We'd make it a very special family affair: go to church, eat fried chicken, take short drives to the country, and visit with aunts and uncles. And if you had good times like that growing up, it's no wonder that Sundays can fill us with a huge void.
Takeaways from the Single Life
Hang on! There are a lot of takeaways from being single. My top tip is love yourself and be very patient with yourself. Find hope and consolation in these prizes that living solo offers:
You may have heard this before, but the only way you can truly love anyone else is if you love yourself first.
Find ways to lift your spirit—you'll come out on the other side much more creative. what sort of things get you excited? In other words, if you had a free afternoon to do what you enjoy, what would it be?
Stop wishing for what could have been. It is so easy to think about the past, especially the good stuff. The good memories take up more head space than the bad, but I think human beings have a tendency to romanticize the not so good stuff.
Living the single life, you get plenty of time to figure out what you want! When you do, you have the freedom to go for it!
Get out there and become the best you can be! Gain strength in knowing YOU have done so much all on your own.